You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. It's a really good start. I do love to listen to ChillStep while I work and this sounds like something I'd have on my playlist.
From the fade out at the end I'm guessing this is either part of multiple tracks or just something unfinished. It feels like there should be more; try experimenting with builds and breaks to make your track longer.
As for the speech, I don't find anything wrong with it. A bit long for my tastes, but that isn't a bad thing. I've heard entire tracks of just speech. Nice job. ;)